Everyone has it, but you really only find out how much you have in the hardest and most difficult times in your life. Most of the time, when you feel like you just don't have anymore, you manage to find more with the help of courage, love, and patience.
I'm about to find out just how much strength I have. Ricky leaves in 11 days for his first training session for deployment. This will be the toughest year of my life to this point. He will be training in the U.S. for about 3 months and then will spend the next 10 months in Afghanistan with the rest of the Oklahoma National Guard. Ricky first told me about his deployment last May and while at first my heart fell into my stomach, I thought, I have tons of time until he actually leaves. So for the last 9 months it's been in the back of my head and I told myself I wouldn't even worry about it until we got back from Hawaii. Well, now we're back from vacation and it's right around the corner. I'm still in a bit of denial about it, the closer it gets, the more people ask about it and how I am and how I'm feeling about it all. I don't mind talking about it at all and for the most part, I'm not too bad. I have certain times when my heart breaks at the thought that soon I won't be able to talk to him everyday or see him for at least 6 months. But there isn't anything we can do about it, we just have to make the best with what we have. So if you ask me about it, don't worry if I burst out in tears....it's only natural haha.
The upside is that he spends his first month training here in Oklahoma and then gets to come back home for 5 days! Then he goes back to training in places like Mississippi and Louisiana. A lot of things are up in the air, timeline wise. I've learned that with the military nothing is a guarantee, things change all the time.
So for you readers out there, bear with me. I'm not sure what direction I want to take this blog. I don't want to be a downer all the time, therefore I have some ideas of things to keep my busy and can update the readers on those things. But I'm sure there will be some times when I'll just share my feelings and how things are going.
Things to keep my busy:
1. My amazing friends and family: I have the most amazing friends and family in the world. Everyone wants to know how to help, has amazing ideas for Ricky's care packages, and is just there to listen to me vent. I have no doubt that they will be the biggest help in making it through the next year. Ricky's family is also so amazing! So caring and inviting me in. I couldn't ask for anything more.
3. New Recipes: I have a goal to try at least one new recipe a week. I'll put pictures and the recipe on here as well as my review. These will mostly all be healthy versions of food, so I hope to educate myself as well as all of you.
4. Weight Loss: Usually I'm one to talk about my weight in public like this. But to be completely I want to get healthier. I'm attending Weight Watchers meeting as well as taking some advice from THIS WONDERFUL BLOG. My workout routine is also changing up. I'm taking a break from long distance running for right now. Not sure when I'm going to pick it back up. But right now I want to focus on getting into a healthy weight range for my height.
5. Puzzles: I went through a tough time in life a couple of years ago and puzzles really seemed to help keep my mind off of the issues. They are really good to help you not snack a lot too(a problem of mine). Plus most of my puzzles are of large cities in the US that I have visited so I hope to frame them and hang them up somewhere.
Well that's it for now. I'll be back soon with an update on life. Thanks for reading!
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